Southern Snow Friendships.

We had a fun surprise Monday morning...it had snowed over night and our world turned a delightful white.

Southern snows are funny things.

They do not happen very often.

When they do the excitement is papable. 

They also do not stick around...here and gone within 24 hours.

As I sat looking out my window I thought of the disappointment that often comes with southern snow.

It got me to thinking about some of the disappointments I have had this year.

I can deal well with most disappointments...but this year one thing in particular has been hard for me.  The disappointment over two friendships that ended.  One in my everyday life and one online.

One was a big surprise to me and was ended on facebook without a word.  Guess you can't get a point across more clearly with a mostly online friendship.  And as much as I want to say good riddance it still hurt.  A lot.  Especially since I had no clue what I had done or said.

The second was a process in that I made the final decision to back off.  It was one of the hardest decisions I have made this year. I prayed really hard about the decision but it was just at a point where my heart was so hurt and I was so weary.  In the end God gave me such a peace about letting go.  It still makes me sad but I know for now...this is for the best.

The reason friendship is such a hard thing for me is well...I am very much a private person and very much an introvert. What you read here on the blog is just a tiny part of my life.  To share some of the things I do here...well that is only Him...calling me to share my heart.  He has definitely made me take steps out of my comfort zone with this blogging and writing thing!  Which has done wonders for me...and of course He knew that!

But as I sat there Monday afternoon I realized how much some friendships are like southern snow.  They come into our lives for just a short time and while here they grace us with beauty.  Then...it is time for them to go...and for us to move on.

Sometimes....we get a southern snow like this one where the next day...the snow has lingered...and will probably linger for another day... the special snow where the beauty is slow to leave us.

Luckily some of our friendships last a lot longer than a southern snow day...the really special ones that may change but stay with us....gracing us with their beauty for years and years.

Today I am chosing to be thankful for southern snow friendships....and the friendships that linger much longer than a southern snow day.  Both help us learn and imprint our hearts with love in such a way that we carry it with us always.

 

To read more Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood posts visit Jen at Finding Heaven.  You will be blessed.

Comments

[Aztechalo]

Beautifully written. I have come to know and love the southern snow friendship over the years. It's always so lovely while it lasts.

Cheers,

Marsha

[Amy Sullivan]

What a great comparison: friendships and Southern snow. This is really well-written Christy.

[Abby]

I forgot to say it was a friend from high school (Jewish) and I had seen her when we taught together at our old school district and she gave no indication something was wrong, but when facebook rolled around, wouldn't be-friend us:(

[Abby]

I love this...it speaks so much into my life of transition...I have never had to 'end' a friendship--step away, which is I guess what you are talking about--the hardest one is still a friend that won't accept my friend request on facebook (or my twin's) because we (I, esp.) was such a vocal Christian and she is Jewish...I would change a lot if I could and want her to forgive, but I can't make her...it's good to remember what we learned from each other that can never be taken away...

I love introverted people too...I love them and think they are rare gems in an extroverted world and me...thanks for sharing what you share!

[Michelle DeRusha]

You are right indeed -- southern snow is a good metaphor for some friendships. The online world is particularly challenging, I think. I've had loyal followers and commenters, people I considered acquaintances at the very least, disappear from my blog universe for reasons I can't define. I always end up wondering, was it something I wrote? Did I say something offensive? Is my writing annoying? I end up internalizing the departure way too much, when it may in fact be just a change in circumstances or interests or lifestyle. I need to develop a thicker skin I think!

[michelle]

Having grown up in a very transient lifestyle, it has only been the last 10 years where I can say I have 1 female best friend and the last year where I have a group of women that I can count on and love like they are my sisters. Praying that you can find a group of women, who not only lift you up personally but can make you accountable to where God is leading you.

[andrea]

I miss snow..so much (being a NY-transplant in the South). But I can completely understand the friendship thing, and unfortunately, am walking through a tough friendship right now. It involves me having to take some steps back and make tough decisions. This was encouraging to me. Thank you!

[Victoria]

Christy, this is so insightful! ps...totally their loss! =)

[Lauren]

Praying for your heart! I've had a similar thing happen this year. It is so hard, but for the best and definitely God's plan for me.

On a brighter note - we got snow too!!! It makes me SO happy! :)

[Erin]

Great way of comparing, Christy. It does hurt when relationships end, but sometimes they need to. Your column today reminds me of a quote: "Friends come into our lives for a reason, season or a lifetime".

Erin

[Jen Ferguson]

This is wise, heart-rendering, and, at the same time, heart-breaking just because of the hurt that had to happen before the healing. I love the analogy to the snow, to the season of some friendships, to the God that is Lord of it all.

[Danielle]

Love this! Sometimes Southern Snow friendships can change you forever, but I do love those that last longer!!!

[Joanne Sher]

You made me choke up, Christy. Praying for you, and praising God that you are choosing thankfulness.

[marlece]

Hi Christy, first time over and really enjoyed your post. It sounds like you are a very good friend. One who is loyal and cherishs 'friendship' in your life.Those that are apart of your life....should be grateful for you. Look forward to reading more.

Marlece

[Kristen]

This post really speaks to me. I was hurt too. This last week I've thought a lot about that one friendship that ended - just hurt over the way it went down and angry at the selfishness but I thought, too, about how some friendships aren't meant for forever...

and then, others, like ours, are.